A: Usually, when you find yourself asking if some type of assistance is needed, more than likely, assistance is needed.
Many of the conditions experienced by older adults do limit mobility and mental acuity. The most common conditions of aging are hearing loss, visual deterioration, arthritis, depression, and heart disease. Alzheimer's or other forms of memory loss affect 6-10 percent of seniors aged 65 to 80, and 35-50 percent of those 85 and older. Based on this information, it's safe to say that there are probably many older adults in our communities who need assistance, but aren't receiving it.
 Jeannine Clark--Q. & A. |
Another way to assess the situation is to observe your father's functioning during your visits. There are two areas of activities that professionals typically investigate that relate to a person's ability to live independently.
First is what is called instrumental activities of daily living or IADLs. These activities include the ability to prepare meals, do housework, manage money, grocery shop, and use the telephone.
The second group of activities is called activities of daily living or ADLs. These activities include the ability to bathe and shower, maintenance of personal hygiene, using the restroom, eating of appropriate meals, taking medication correctly, and ability to move around the inside of the house.
No one wants to be dependent on others, and it's especially hard to have to allow others into your personal affairs, but the aging process requires us to make many compromises, and this is one of them. Most people by the age of 80 could benefit from some type of assistance. The amount of assistance can range from a weekly visit to help lift the spirits, to the need of personal assistance for several hours a day.
If, in doing your assessment, you find that there is a need for assistance, be gentle in your approach. Remember that your father may be facing some major changes in his ability to remain independent. Allow your father the opportunity to arrange his own assistance, but let him know that you are available if he needs you to help. At the same time, begin your own research into senior services.
By helping your father, you also may be helping yourself. According to many reports, the loss of work time for adult children who are caring for an aging parent is quickly reaching epidemic proportions.
There are many things that an adult child can do to help a parent who is experiencing a change in their independence. Even if the parent isn't cooperative, or ready to look at the situation, you can start taking steps to ensure your parent's safety.
The best way to start is by visiting your local Senior Center and reading any literature they can provide you on the subject of assessing care needs. Another recommendation is to schedule a meeting with someone who is skilled in assessing older adult needs. These people are usually social workers, who work as private professional geriatric care managers, or are part of a community-based senior center. Initial consultations are usually free, and it's good to at least speak to someone about your concerns, even if you aren't ready to take action.
Jeannine Clark is a Pescadero resident, medical social worker and private geriatric care manager with Clark Consulting. Send questions to Clark Consulting, P.O. Box 101, Pescadero, CA 94060, or email to: clark@southcoast.net.
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